So Uncool.. I Love That

"The only true currency in this bankrupt world is what you share with someone else when you're uncool"

Lester Bangs

I guess we learn pretty early in life about the all consuming importance of COOL.  I mean we really have such a vanishing window of opportunity in which to figure it out don't we?  Gotta act quickly or be forever lost choking in the unfortunate dust known as "uncool".  When I was 9 my sister was 17 & she was the epitome of all things cool. Beautiful long curly dark hair, always dressed to the nines & luxurious long nails which she flawlessly kept painted pale pink. She was always busy doing things that cool kids do & always talking on her fabulously snazzy light up in the dark phone to friends who drove cars.
Her room & her belongings were an obsession & a thing of mystery to me as she always kept her bedroom door locked when she was not at home. My parents allowed this only because I had been busted too  many times rifling through her belongings or trotting around in pink pumps with ill applied mascara & shiny red lip gloss. A constant source of sibling fights & non harmony moments, which of course to me seemed to be blown wayyyy out of proportion. Come on, I would have gladly welcomed her into my room ANY old time she wanted. Why wouldn't she just do the same?

 This particular holiday season our parents threw a party & they allowed my sis to invite her entire class. I remember running around the house begging for things to do as my mom prepared food. Could I please stay up late when they got here? Could I please hand out all the cards for games?  Give out snacks? pick out the music?? I guess it was finally decided that I could act as the handler of all coats as her guests arrived. I was stoked about this idea & took it extremely serious. Wouldn't they all think of me as totally grown up & cool if I was the Coat Check Girl? I would be the fastest coat check girl of all time. Oooo I would steal the spotlight from my perfect sister with my skill & expertise & SHINE before all of her cool friends!  As the night progressed I smushed my nose further & further against the cold front window pane, eagerly awaiting car lights from afar so that I could be On-Guard, ready for new arrivals in need of my coat services.  Quickly grabbing coats from each guest, I ran with determination & utmost speed..

Boy coats in one stack on the bed, Girl coats in another. 

 I can only imagine what a sight of embarrassment I must have been for a 17 year old beauty on her big party night.  I hated the fuss of hair at that age & never understood it, so I kept it above my ears at a boyish length. I never lingered near a brush in fear that my mom might want to use it on me.  My favorite attire was a pair of overalls from my grandpa & a brown cardigan sweater which to this day I still believe to be the softest thing I've ever owned. Anyway, as I carried about my task of importance ( in my favorite outfit) I suddenly heard my sister along with 2 friends who happened to be boys laughing in the hallway,
"Dude WHO is the little boy in overalls pushing his nose up against the window? We started laughing at him from a block away & then he nearly knocked us over grabbing our coats & running. What's up with him? Is He Ok?  Ohhh what? it's your SISTER? Noway hahahaha"

  As they laughed hysterically I crumbled.

 "WHAT? ME?  Are they talking about Me?  A BOY?" 

Was I not the fastest Coat Check Girl Ever?
Did they not notice my expertise? My SKILL?
Was I not COOL?
Nope
Apparently 

Really 

Not 

Cool 


I think a lot changed for me that night.
I'm pretty sure I put away those comfy overalls & that cardigan for good & decided HAIR could be ok I guess.

I often wonder how the world might look so different
How we all might be so different

if No One ever told us

 we weren't Cool

Hepburn Hugs & McQueen Dreams

xo

Birdee Bow

The Ers. Whats Yours?

 "There's Always some reason to feel not good enough & it's hard at the end of the day"  
Sarah McLachlan

Being in the business of music (ok scratch that ) Being in the business of Life is a sure fire way to get caught up in a web which I very abhorrently refer to as the Ers.  The Ers often land with a screaming BOOM! of a voice in the face of adversity, or sometimes as a whispering nemesis in the late night hours. 

 "Suddenly, without warning they appear (insert Psycho shower scene music here)  The dreaded Ers! Those insidious creatures compelling us to tag on an "er" to every validation of  our own existence. Thus creating sentences which begin with Should be & go on to include words like smarter, prettier, wiser, hotter, trendier, richer, older, cuter, bolder, cooler, younger,  faster, funnier, wittier, happier, hipper, taller, stronger, anything&everything-er but always better Better BettER!!! Wreaking havoc upon civilization & seeking to destroy the courage & self esteem of mankind. Oh will this tyranny ever end?"

Yep the Tyranny ends. Right here. Right Now.

Like a Ray Gun empowered with
Grammatical Ammunition, 
FIRE off your own Ers.

 Believer, Thinker, Scene Stealer, Ass Kicker, Doer, Achiever, Fearless Unapologetic Dreamer

The Ers. 

 What's Yours?

Hepburn Hugs & McQueen Dreams
xo
Birdee Bow